Saturday, December 22, 2012

Play Along to Belong

"I think you'll find your place here. In time you will learn a lot, and you will belong."
When Laurel said those words to me before the holiday break I knew the words were full of warmth.  But instinctively, I felt sick inside. Belong? Like the protagonists in Disney movies? What is this "belong" word?
I took those words home and thought carefully. Belong. To be a part of something reciprocal. To sense a connection on planes physical, intellectual, spiritual, emotional. To understand and be understood.
Have I ever belonged somewhere before? Will I recognize belonging when I get there?
I have always struggled with identity in all forms. Can I belong somewhere, even if I am not sure how to characterize and identify what I bring to the world?
I will have to trust Laurel's judgment. I am humbled by her acceptance and warmth toward me. I don't understand what I am aiming for with belonging, but I am going to trust the process of learning karate and assume that I will understand after more practice.

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