Saturday, May 24, 2014

Well Done, Overdone

It's a good thing I'm a touch typist because I can't keep my eyes open.  I'm lying on my couch, which is where I have been all afternoon.  I have never regretted getting up early on Saturdays for Saturday morning karate class.  But sometimes I work very hard and end up forfeiting the rest of my Saturday.

When I get too weak or sore to function a few initial feelings come up from a bowl of little insecurities, all of them irrational.  Am I being lazy?  How can I really be this tired?  How am I going to accomplish X and Y?  Am I really in pain from something I did in class or is this pain I would have had anyway?  All sorts of insecurities.  These feelings are legitimate, as they stem from a wide variety of athletics-related and life-related events.  However, they are not particularly useful thoughts.  They're just thoughts, so they come and go as they will, and I don't have to judge them, or do anything about them, other than let them drift by without internalizing them.

That's a lot easier to do when I'm not stuck on the couch.  I don't even know how I'd drag myself upstairs to bed right now, though I did a good job of heating up homemade soup to get hydration, salt and nutrition in.  I'm glad I can eat carrots, even if I have to boil them to death to chew them without dislocating my jaw or breaking a(nother) tooth on one.

The message I want to send is this: everything with EDS is done in terms of compensation.  If I do one activity I will forfeit another.  In this case it was a day, and probably both ankles for a while, as soon as I remember where my braces are.  Why would I go all-out in karate like this if I know it's going to have this outcome?  Because everything in my life has this outcome.  The challenge is to time it well, plan it out, and make it count!  Easier said than done, but it really is a simple model, which is often the best kind of model.

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